A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Woman
I went home for Mother's Day and hoped to go through a lot of old photos from my childhood to bring them home to scan. In the meantime I found a lot of the things I used to write as a child and they cracked me up to no end, so I thought I'd share.
The first installment is from a handwritten journal I found called Megan's Trip to Florida December 1988 which was right after my 7th birthday. My grandmother took me to Disney World. I'm pretty impressed with my reportage skills, and much like now, everything revolves around where we ate!
We went to the airport and mommy all most got lost. Then we put all our bags on convair. I got my ticket and the lady let me see her computer. We got on the plan and every place looked like perfect little boxes! We got off the plane and got on the other plane. We got up in the air and went above the clouds. They gave us a drink and some peanuts. I felt very, very happy.
We got off the air plane and we picked up our bags. We got on a shuttle. Mommom rented a car and drove to the hotle. She drove to the wrong hotle. The the lady at the counter and showed her the derection to the hotle. It's called: The Howard Johnson hotle. We ate dinner at the House of pankakes. Then we watched T.V. and went to bed.
We went to Disney world and took pitchers of me and Chip and Dale, Minnie, Goofy, Tigger, and Winnie the Pooh. I went on lots of rides. And my favorate ride was Space Mountain. It goes sidewards and glows in the dark. And Misson to Mars. A Person talked to us and then we sat down in chairs. We blasted off and they took pitchers of mars. The ground shook very, very much. Minnie kissed me on the nose. We stopped at Pinokeo's. We went on more rides! Then all of us went on the monerail took us to the parking lot. We got in the car and went home. All of us ate at Denny's for dinner. Then we got into the hotel and went to sleep.
I woke up at 8:00 in the morning. We ate at our hotel. Then we went to Sea World. First we went to the dolfin pool and fed them fish. Then we went throw the Rain Forest. We saw parets and a lake. From there we went to see The Legend of Shamu. A woman got into a big, big pool with all of the killer whales. She went under the water, and came up on Shamu's nose! There is a baby whale and it does what ever the mother does! They jumped up in the air and dove right back in. Then we saw the Ski Pirates. The girls were mad because they couldn't play pirates. At the end the boys and the girls made a big pyramid. We went to a show called New friends. It had dolfins, and white whales. A little boy went up to the dolfins and played with them. Then we went to Perkin and then went to bed.
We ate breakfast at Denny's and I ordered a Granite Slam Jr. Then we went to Epcot Center and firt we went to Spaceship Earth. It had stars and the Moon. And we went on different ride which talked about the future, motion energy, the Land, The Living Seas, Captain Eo. We went to France, Morocco, U.S.A., Germany, China, Norway, Mexico. At night we saw IllumiNations. It was really beautyful. We went to Disney Village and saw a show about the birth of Jesus. At 10:00 we finally got dinner at Kentucky Fried Chicken. After dinner we went to sleep.
I woke up in the morning and walked out on the pateo and it was very warm. So I got my swimsuit on and went into the hot tub. I sat in there for a few mins. and got out and swam in the pool. I went inside the hotel and went up the elevator. Then I got changed and ate at Denny's. Then we went Old Town. I rode on a rollercoaster called The Beast. It had two huge hills. then we went to the air port. We ate lazonya and salad, cookies and pretzles. We got off the plane. We got on another plane. We flew for a long time. Finally we landed and I was happy to see my mother.
From the first publication I ever worked on, the Woodlyn News, my elementary school newspaper, 1991, Halloween edition:
On the night of witches and ghosts,
The night I really like the most,
On the night of scares and frights,
The night I call my night of nights,
On the night of candy and treats,
The night I think is just for me,
The funny thing is that poem is still totally true! Also I think I might have been an original member of The Misfits. Always a morbid sensibility.
When I read this one on the train ride home I literally snorted outloud with laughter. This won a big award, and I now have a picture of me receiving it as well.
From "Delaware County Reading Council/Intermediate Unit Young Author's Project 1991 Winning Entries":
Megan Marucci, Grade 4
The Case of the Missing Masterpiece
One sweltering summer's day, I, Megan Marucci, alias Agent 007 was cruising Las Angles in my cherry red 2017 Ferrari when the mayor, Melissa Lilley, called me on my car phone. "007, the Moanin' Lisa was stolen from the Metropolitan Museum of Art! Please find it and you will receive a medal of honor. You could hear her usual cheerful voice turn into one of fear and worry. I began right on the case.
Going about ninety five miles per hour, I haulted in front of the dome-shaped museum. I saw something strange about it. In shock, I pulled out my high-tech, state-of-the-art lazer-phazer gun and shot it. It didn't damage the museum, but it did remove the enormous crystal-like iceball surrounding the museum. I walked in aware of the dangers ahead in my journey ahead.
I almost slipped on the oil covered steps that lead in. I just made it past the falling ax in the rare book department. I also completely avoided the tar and alligator pit. I avoided each trap with precision and care.
Finally, I was at the scene of the hideous crime. Then, there stood the twins who own the entire enterprising building. Tracy and Jenny Sabatura were wearing identical sweaters (both in hairline detail) and designer Guess Jeans. They were also wearing Reebok Pumps. Jenny and Tracy were quite wealthy people. I began to inquire them about the missing masterpiece. Then Jenny gave me a clue, "Ask the restoring painters, they might know." I went straight toward the basement.
The farther I went, the more eerie it became. Suddenly, a white glove caught my eye. It was pure white, except for a few speckles of paint.
As I continued, I saw a faint, distant light from afar. I heard mumbling, but I couldn't make it out.
I slowly walked down the rickety staircase. I found the Moanin' Lisa! Ryan Burke, Megan Hopkins, and Kim Cacciatore were restoring it! It wasn't stolen! Another case solved by the famous Agent 007!
I think this survey is probably from about 5th grade.
Name: Megan Marucci
Nickname, if any: Meg
Birthday: December 1, 1981
Activities: After School Sports, 4-H Club, Safety
Favorite Teacher(s): Mrs. Blair, Mrs.
Best Subject: Language Arts
Hobbies: Roller Blades
Favorite Color: Aquamarine
Favorite Music Artist(s): Amy Grant, Mariah Carey
Favorite TV Show: Dinosaurs
Favorite Movie: Freddy's Dead
Favorite Book: Phantom Valley, The Dark
Favorite Food: Pizza
Favorite Safety Duty: Corner Duty
Favorite Time of Day: Recess
1. If I had one wish it would be... to become a successful writer when I grow up.
2. If I were stranded on a deserted island with 3 other people, I would like those people to be... Tracy Sabatura, my cousin (what that's it? Eff everyone else I guess!)
3. When I am an adult I hope to be... a writer
4. If I were principal and could change one rule it would be... to change the way people treat each other
I, Megan Marucci, leave homework to my little brother.
This story cracks me up as well. I love how I have a Spanish teacher for a husband. Risque! Also I make lots of culturally insensitive remarks haha...
From "Winning Stores by Elementary and Middle School students in the Young Authors Project Spring, 1992":
Megan Marucci, fifth grade
The Gypsy's Eye
Salutations! It is I, Roxanne Blumington, the former principal of Lakeside School. I have a strange yet funny tale to tell. It all began when I went to dinner with Senor Jose Chavez, the Spanish teacher, who happens to be my husband.
We drove to a little restaurant on the "wrong side of the tracks." We walked in and the hostess showed us to a table. it was then that I noticed the place was deserted except for an old, wrinkled gypsy woman. Something about her caught my attention. Then I gasped in horror! She had a glass eye that seemed to look right through you! I pulled myself together and began to order.
A few minutes later she got up and started walking toward us, holding an old coffee can. I tried to remain calm. She asked in a quavering voice, "Give money to a poor gypsy family?" We politely refused, explaining our own financial difficulties. She slowly walked away, mumbling something unintelligible.
The next day at school everything went wrong. I had to suspend a child for refusing to do his work and then calling me a not-so-nice name. The problem with this was that his father was going to donate several computers to our upper grade classes, but after the incident with his son, decided to purchase a new slurpee machine for the local Quick-E-Mart instead. Many other unfortunate events occurred that day that I don't have time to explain right now.
These behavioral problems continued several times a day for about a week. Jose became very upset. He was extremely concerned about me. Finally he dragged me to a Spanish witch doctor. I definitely didn't believe in that sort of thing but I went along with it. It couldn't hurt, could it? After all, Jose is my husband. So I sucked in my gut and walked into the dimly lit, misty room.
When I saw the witch doctor, I immediately believed. There was a certain something about him that just made you feel he could help. So Jose and I told him my little tale. He nodded at various places along the way. After we finished, there was a moment of silence. Then he seemed to "grunt" with laughter. Jose and I looked at each other doubtfully. When the witch doctor finally stopped chuckling, he called to his translator. He whispered into her ear. He nodded and giggled. Then she gasped, trying to catch her breath, "He says you don't need a witch doctor,. All you need is a good vacation."
As I sit here on the sunny beaches of Maui, I reflect on those days and laugh. I'm now the superintendent of the Wrigley School District. Along the way I have learned two very valuable lessons:
1. Just because someone is different doesn't mean you should be suspicious of him.
2. Everyone, even Roxanne Blumington, needs a vacation once in a while.
I was just so tickled reading these. Once a nerd, always a nerd.